It's Been a Day

It's been one of those days. I'm both physically and emotionally exhausted. It's not any one thing. It's the cumulative effect of having a lot of responsibilities hitting at the same time, trying to meet expectations that - let's be honest here - I set a little too high once in a while, and struggling to maintain a calm demeanor when what I really want to do is scream at a few people and then cry. The school carnival is Saturday night. I have a magazine going to layout on Monday morning. My house is completely trashed. My kids have been sick. Again.

I knew I was getting overwhelmed, so I built some 'fun' into my day today. It's Quilt Shop Hop time (where several area quilt stores throw a collaborative event and I drive all over the place browsing and shopping and enjoying myself immensely). I typically go to all of the 9 stores participating, which takes an entire day since they're all over this corner of the state. This year, I knew I wouldn't be able to take an entire day - or even half of a day - so I picked three stores that I could reach fairly quickly and combined that trip with another trip I needed to make to take care of something for the carnival. I picked up a couple of small things, allowing myself to dream of a time in the future when I might be able to start a project, and headed back to town to go to my very favorite quilt shop.

This turned out to be a mistake. I haven't been in this shop since before Christmas. I haven't been able to work very often on my quilting and when I have squeezed quilting time in, I've had the supplies I've needed. But I love this little quilt shop and I love the women who run it and I've missed it. Evidently, they have missed me too, because I was greeted with hugs and demands for explanations for my absence and promptly put to work manning a table during a rush of customers. I left with tears in my eyes. And a bag of goodies that I may have accidentally purchased in the mistaken belief that I needed new fabric *lol*

I LOVE this shop. I would love to work there. And I have a standing invitation to become an employee anytime I'm ready. But little quilt shops don't pay their employees enough to cover daycare costs, so I'm waiting for the day when my girls are all in school and I can 'moonlight' a bit to feed my creative soul.

Don't get me wrong - I have a great job now and I love it, too. I have a standing offer to become a full time employee there, and a boss who still teases me about employees who go all the way to Vietnam to adopt a baby to avoid a full time job! I can't see myself leaving this company, with a boss who has made me part of the family and a flexible schedule and a great salary and work that let's me be the 'chief everything' for my magazines. But one day a week at the quilt store? That would be more play than work and I hope the opportunity is still there when I'm ready to take it on.

Wow, talk about a rambling post. Thanks for hanging in there with me. There's just a lot going on lately and when I walked into the world's best quilt store, I realized how much of my life has been absorbed with work and school responsibilities lately. It will get better - it will! And in the meantime, my house can stay messy and my quilting will wait a bit and I'll keep the merlot handy.