There's this thing going around on Facebook. No, not the bra color thing. I haven't participated in that, but it's making me feel much better about the lack of Wow! factor in my own lingerie selections... although that's really not where I'm going with this post...
Anywho, there's this thing. Maybe you've seen it. It goes something like this:
Put this as your status if you or somebody you know has suffered BABY LOSS. ♥♥♥ The majority won't put it on, because unlike cancer, baby loss is a taboo. ♥♥♥ Break the silence. ♥♥♥ In Memory of all the ~Angel~ babies gone too soon but never forgotten!!
I haven't posted this as my Facebook status, although I certainly meet the criteria. I see my family members posting this, and I nod my head, remembering those losses and the grief they felt. Or I see a friend posting this and I think, 'Wow, I didn't know'. And I comment on the post so that they know I know and that now, while they're thinking about it, I'm thinking about it too.
But I haven't posted it, even though I've lost babies. Even though I still remember every August, December, and February that I could have babies with birthdays in those months. Even though I still wonder what those babies would have been... would have looked like... would have become.
It's not that I haven't accepted those losses, because I have. If I hadn't lost the first pregnancy, I wouldn't have my sassy Miss N. If I hadn't grieved through two more miscarriages, I wouldn't have my miracle girl, Miss A. And if I hadn't been emotionally destroyed by that last loss, I might not have leaped quite so fearlessly into Miss P's adoption. Because those three babies weren't meant to be born, I have three daughters who were meant to be mine.
But I haven't posted it on Facebook. Not because it's taboo. Not because I don't want my friends or family to remember my losses. Not because I don't think it's important. But because it seems to require so much more than a status update on Facebook.
In Memory of all the ~Angel~ babies gone too soon but never forgotten!
6 comments:
I would have a child who would have been 6 in November, but then I wouldn't have Adam.
Amen.
For everything there is a reason...we just don't know what it is at the time and through the grieving. Many women are silent grievers and we have no idea.
I would have had one that would be turning 8 and another turning 3. Those gave me the courage to move on and be blessed with Bennett.
Thank you for sharing. It's not an easy topic to talk about.
Very well said. Thank you.
Thanks, Dianna! Glad I'm not the only that felt this way!!
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